I've been waiting...

Thursday, February 2, 2012

The Waiting Jar

When I first started this process, in March 2006, China was processing 30 or more days worth of files each month. The woman from the agency said to "get ready, because after I submit my paperwork, I should expect to have the baby home within 7-8 months." 7 months later, my paperwork was complete, fingerprints done (I'm not a criminal by the way), house inspection passed and my file was logged into China on September 13, 2006. At that point China had slowed down a little (unknown to me) and was processing about 20 or more days worth of files a month. So, I thought to myself, it would take a little longer than I thought, maybe even a year and a half. No big deal. At that time they were finishing up July 2005 but still I thought, there were less than 400 days worth of files/LIDs ahead of me. Really not that much considering they completed almost a month (20 or 30 days) at a time. I know all this information now, years later, but at the time when I submitted my file, I was very green about the whole process, like most families were, and had no idea how the whole Log-in date/referral thing went.

Almost immediately after I was logged in however, referrals slowed to a crawl with sometimes only 1 or 2 days worth of files being referred each month. The wait stretched out and increased exponentially and it went on forever with no end in sight. I wanted to give up and I needed something to give me hope.

The only light was that even though the movement was painfully slow, it was moving. Every month files were being referred and people were being matched with babies. Families were created.

So, in October, 2010, when China got down to the last 100 days ahead of my date, Sept 13, I started the waiting jar. It is simply a jar filled with 100 stones. Every month I take out as many stones as there have been referral days. So for example, this month I took out 5 stones, representing from August 10 to 15th.

Here is what my jar looked like 15 months ago, filled to the top with 100 stones:

Here is what my jar looks like now:

It give me encouragement to see how far I've come.
I can't wait till it's empty.

7 comments:

Liz and Ava said...

Hey Suzanne,
Just found your blog link from Catherines. Didn't know you were so close...must be so exciting. Can't wait to follow along your blog and see Grace in your arms!

Suzanne said...

Welcome Liz, nice to hear from you! And yes, I am very excited!

Nilia said...

Suzanne!! Love your blog thanks for directing me to it! I've read a few posts so far but will read the older ones when I get some time. I can't wait for your dream to come true, can you guess who I am by my "handle"?? XO

dayna said...

We will be counting down with you Suzanne!

Suzanne said...

Thanks Dayna and welcome to the blog!

The Redhead said...

What a cool way to get a visual for your long wait.
P.S. Love your daughter's name by the way ;)

Suzanne said...

thank you! The jar hasn't quite emptied out as quickly as I would have liked but it's almost there now! I checked our your blog. When do you expect to get a referral? Do you have a timeline?